The Dialog Blog
The Dialog Blog
People say it. I write it.

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

The Ferry Building

Posted at 1:32 PM

"How do you think that thing in New Orleans will affect Monday Night Football?"

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

One Market

Posted at 3:14 PM

"Steve McDairyQueen. Get it? Instead of Steve McQueen."
"That's funny. Ha."

1 California, MUNI

Posted at 1:13 PM

"Are you trying to get out?"
"Yeah, that was the idea. Me walking out the door."

Monday, August 29, 2005


Posted at 11:09 AM

"This go to Berkeley? Anyone? This train to Berkeley?"
"Does this train go to Berkeley? Can someone help this guy?"
"What's he want?"
"Does this train go to Berkeley?"
"How should I know?"
"Does anyone know?"
"No, he wants the Richmond train."
"You want the Richmond train."
"Get on the Richmond train."
"What train?"
"Richmond train, you stupid ass!"

Friday, August 26, 2005

One Market

Posted at 3:51 PM

"You know, these quotes on Starbucks cups would be far more interesting if they were from prisons or people in mental institutions."
"You should suggest that."

One Market

Posted at 1:36 PM

"Last night sucked. I'm watching my neighbors house, and I fed their cat. But it wasn't their cat. I let some stray into their house and fed it."
"How did you know it was a stray?"
"My wife said their cat had a collar. This one didn't, and it clicked with me. So, I went back to their house and chased the damn cat all over until it jumped out the bathroom window. Took me half an hour. I missed The Simpsons."

Thursday, August 25, 2005

One Market

Posted at 6:04 PM

"I have the dumbest friends. She's looking for guys on J-Date, and she's Catholic."
"What's J-Date?"
"A dating site for Jewish people. Her second husband was Jewish."

24 Hour Fitness: 2nd @ Folsom

Posted at 11:12 AM

"Where's she from?"
"London or Philly. I can't tell."
"She's hot."
"Totally hot. She sent an email out to a bunch of people that said Let's all get fucked up this weekend!"
"That's so hot, man."
"I'm like, my penis has got all the alcohol you need."
"Hey, what's this song?"
"I don't know. It's from the eighties."
"Spot me on squats?"

One Market

Posted at 11:11 AM

"I can't wait to get a job and just sit there."

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

One Market

Posted at 3:55 PM

"I went to a high school where most of the kids got Porches on their sixteenth birthday."
"That's just dumb."

One Market

Posted at 9:27 AM

"For whatever reason, the Giants are having ethnic nights. I want to get tickets to the Irish night."
"I wonder if there will be German nights."
"No German nights. People saw German nights in the nineteen-thirties."

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

One Market

Posted at 2:24 PM

"Hey, Pete, how are you doing? How was school today? Uh huh. Yeah. You rode your bike today? In the driveway. Sounds like fun. What are you going to do now? Eat cookies. Uh huh. You know what I've been doing at work? Playing computer all day. Yeah. Can you give the phone back to mommy please? No? Yeah we can play computer at home too. Yeah. Okay, please give the phone back to mommy. Bye Pete."

One Market

Posted at 10:26 AM

"You should use the pool at the Club One on Fillmore. You won't swim into as many old Chinese ladies just floating around."

1 California, MUNI

Posted at 8:45 AM

"What are you up to tonight?"
"Watching this six-hour documentary on the Nuremburg trials. And eating pesto."
"Can't top that."

One Market

Posted at 8:44 AM

"Hey, how was your weekend?"
"I think I'm still hung over."

Monday, August 22, 2005

Crepe House, Polk @ Sacramento

Posted at 1:28 PM

"Baxter, come! Baxter! Sorry, I know how you Arab people feel about dogs."

One Market

Posted at 1:27 PM

"No, camping is out for me. It makes me think of sodomy and axe murderers."

Friday, August 19, 2005

One Market

Posted at 1:23 PM

"Sys admins are like the janitors of the computer world. People only notice what they do is important when they're not around."
"I have a friend in Santa Barbara who's a sys admin. I asked him how he learned to answer so many different computer questions. He winked and opened Google."

One Market

Posted at 10:44 AM

"House Blend coffee... Coming from this place, that doesn't sound like a good idea."

One Market

Posted at 10:25 AM

"I'm still debating the whole Dr. Pepper for breakfast thing."

One Market, elevator

Posted at 9:55 AM

"Oh my God. I'm like, so jealous. All she'll do there is wear flip-flops and shop."
"She's worried about which flip-flops to wear."
"I'm like, so jealous. She can buy a gizillion flip-flops there."
"It'll be hot and muggy."
"She'll spend so much money shopping. I wish I was going."

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

24th @ Noe

Posted at 1:07 PM

"So how old are you?"
"Oh, you're going to make a grown man cry."
"Oh, Lord. I'm fifty-six."
"Oh. Sorry."
"It's okay. You didn't know. But stop petting Buster. He's a vicious Labrador that might attack you."

The Embarcadero

Posted at 1:02 PM

"I was like, Let's just sell the fucking house while we can, and move. She was like, Where are we going to go? I was like, Where all people from California go: Oregon. She was like, There's nothing there. And I was like, There's no traffic and assholes there."
"Dude, there's assholes everywhere."
"But not traffic."

The Ferry Building

Posted at 1:00 PM

"The pressure to potty-train kids these days is just enormous."

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

One Market

Posted at 3:06 PM

"I accidentally left the Giants tickets in a pair of pants I took to the cleaners, and, of course, they don't know how they magically sprouted legs and walked away."

The Embarcadero

Posted at 3:05 PM

"You stupid seagull. Fuck you. Yeah, you."

Sunday, August 14, 2005

One Market

Posted at 6:10 PM

"Sweet cakes. Cakes. Hello? Hello? Cakes? Yeah, it's me. What are you doing? Uh, huh. Uh, huh. That's sweet. Uh, huh. Uh, huh. Oh, that's really sweet. I'll be home soon. Okay. Love you too."

Friday, August 12, 2005

One Market, elevator

Posted at 3:14 PM

"She gave us the, like, don't look at me."
"Yeah, fuck her and the horse she rode in on."
"And the horse she ate."
"Ha-ha-ha-that's classic. The horse she ate."

Howard @ Beale

Posted at 2:14 PM

"Mr. Tummer. Like as in stomach. No, sorry. Bad example. As in Drummer."

Club One, Embarcadero Center

Posted at 2:11 PM

"Hey, Tom. Is the big guy coming in?"
"No, he couldn't make it."
"Right. The big guy's not a fan of working out."
"Well, that's why he's the big guy."

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Pier 7

Posted at 12:27 PM

"I want to catch a fish!"
"Me too! Big one!
"I want to catch a seal!"
"Honey, you can't catch a seal."
"You just can't. That's why."

The Ferry Building

Posted at 12:25 PM

"They laid off a bunch of both of them."

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Farfield, CA, Paradise Valley Retirement Community

Posted at 4:32 PM

"The guy to the right was in a glider over France during D-Day."
"He got shot up pretty bad during the landing."
"Does he ever talk about what he saw?"
"Naw, everyone knows what he saw was bad. The guy to the left was in the Bataan Death March."
"For three years, he survived a Japanese POW camp."
"Does he hate the Japanese?"
"I don't think so. He never talks about them. But needless to say, he doesn't like Japanese food."

Farfield, CA, Paradise Valley Retirement Community

Posted at 4:31 PM

"Oh, he's as Irish as Patty's pig."

Jackson @ Webster

Posted at 9:24 AM

"Silk Coffin, that used to be a good band?"
"No, Soul Coughing."

One Market

Posted at 9:20 AM

"I'm so sick of this security badge. Like this thing is going to stop terrorists. Nobody had these stupid things before 9-11. How many terrorists have these badges stopped?"
"Just quit losing it and you'll have nothing to complain about. The receptionist always buzzes you in."

Dotties' True Blue Cafe

Posted at 9:18 AM

"That's nice. Our great veterans died on the beaches of Normandy so that French tourist could make faces at us through the window, while we eat our breakfast. So nice."

Friday, August 05, 2005

The Ferry Building

Posted at 11:15 AM

"Hey, that cup of Blue Bottle Coffee was great. But it was $4.50. My lunch only cost $5.00."

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Dolores Park

Posted at 10:16 AM

"Just tell me what to do! I was robbed, raped, and beaten last night! What do I do!?"
"Be with friends."
"Fuck you!"

First @ Mission

Posted at 10:13 AM

"She dumps him. And now she's going with him to Hollywood. And she's paying for it. I think she's going to try and kill him."

18th @ Church

Posted at 10:11 AM

"No, listen to me. You will give me my money. Yes you will. You will give me my money tomorrow. Oh, yeah? Tomorrow. I will have my money in my hand. No, you don't want to know what I'll do. No, you don't. Tomorrow you will give me my money. Listen, you..."

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

The Embarcadero

Posted at 12:29 PM

"Okay, we're a democratic family. We'll vote. Who wants to go the art museum? Okay, who wants to go to Chinatown?"
"Yeah! Firecrackers! Chinatown, yeah!"
"Oh, come on. Dad, I'm tired of firecrackers."
"Firecrackers, yeah! All right, Dad! Firecrackers!"

The Embarcadero

Posted at 12:27 PM

"Hey, you're a guest in this country. Don't you scare our seagulls."

Mission @ Beale

Posted at 12:25 PM

"It's 'cuz she's fine. And she know dat. I tell her dat. She can do whatever the goddamn hell she want, 'cuz she fine."

Monday, August 01, 2005

24th @ Sanchez

Posted at 4:02 PM

"No, that's my secondary Buddha."
"Karma's confusing."

About Me

My name is Gavin. I'm a 32-year-old San Francisco, CA, resident who enjoys hearing the oddest conversations and sharing them with you.


Frank Black
Community of Writers
Sean Kirkpatrick
Drew's Script-O-Rama
Museum of Bad Art
The I.F.O.C.E


Zen Habits
The Happiness Project
Dean Karnazes
Mighty Foods
dangerous compassions
From the Rear View Mirror
Tony Pierce
Kevin Drum
Oliver Willis

Books To Read

Caught Inside

The Guards

All The Trouble You Need

Hardcore Zen

Keeping Warm


Continental Drift

Chez Chance

The Los Angeles Diaries

Bear Flag Rising


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