"Everyone in the office is getting called in for jury duty."
"Unbelievable."
"They should just hold the trial here."
"The trial is already here..."
"Tell me about it."
"You know, I here they use PG&E bills to put people on juries."
"How do they do that?"
"I don't know, I just heard about it."

"That comp class is hella hard, dude. Mrs. Gomez, is like, uh, a bitch."
"Spelling sucks."
"I, like, get the As and Os all messed up and shit. It hella sucks."
"I'm not going no more. Fuck comp."
"Yeah, dude. Fuck it."

"What'd you got going on tonight?"
"Drinks, of course. Followed by the Tranny Shack."

"Asshole cops always bustin' me. Can't a girl just party?"

"You say my name?"
"No, I said goddamnit."

"The Bible says the children, y'all! Momma used to say the children! The wrath of God is going to come down on children!"

"Hey, how was your date on Sunday?"
"She was fat."
"Oh."
"Typically, if they send you a picture with only their face, they're fat."

"You think they'll let me wear sandals here? My feet need to air out."
"Sure, I see women with sandals."
"You know, at some places it's illegal to wear sandals."

"I smoked non-addictive marijuana daily for over twenty years."

"Hey, man. Have a good day. Have a good day. Fuck you then, asshole!"