The Dialog Blog
The Dialog Blog
People say it. I write it.

Sunday, April 30, 2006

Franklin @ Van Ness

Posted at 6:27 PM

"Hey, you just ran a red light asshole! And you're a fat!"

Thursday, April 27, 2006

One Market

Posted at 9:45 PM

"I know this guy from Korea who told me that when they lay someone off over there, they wheel the person's desk into the elevator. That way, when the person comes into work, they know they've been let go, and so does everyone else. No need to beat around the bush."

One Market

Posted at 2:13 PM

"I can gain twenty pounds just thinking about New Orleans."

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

One Market

Posted at 3:45 PM

"How's Pete?"
"Oh, he's been up to general jackassery."

Market @ California

Posted at 2:00 PM

"What?! That bitch said what?! I never called her that. That stupid bitch. You tell her I never said that shit."

Elevator, One Market

Posted at 1:57 PM

"My Dad's retired in Hawaii."
"Wow, that's great. Does he spend all his time at the beach?"
"No, he's got an artificial hip and an oxygen tank, so he doesn't get out much. He likes to sit by a window and watch the ships go in and out of the harbor."

Monday, April 24, 2006

Embarcadero Center

Posted at 3:11 PM

"You ever notice his girlfriend looks like a Martian?"

Thursday, April 20, 2006

1 California, MUNI

Posted at 1:47 PM

"Is he like gay playboy or hip-hop playboy? Oh, that's not good. You're too old for that."

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

One Market

Posted at 3:20 PM

"If you eat, you make the shit. Don't eat if you not want to make the shit."

Embarcadero BART Station

Posted at 1:07 PM

"Sweet man love."

Monday, April 17, 2006

One Market

Posted at 10:12 AM

"His speech was a little too political for me. It had something to do with child molesters in churches, and if God allows that kind of thing to happen, then God must condone child molesting. It didn't make a lot of sense to me, really."

Friday, April 14, 2006

One Market

Posted at 4:53 PM

"Are we drinking tonight?"
"Huh, tonight? No, I haven't seen my wife in days. When I'm not at work, I'm drinking with you guys, and my wife is getting pissed."

UCSF Medical Center

Posted at 4:05 PM

"I don't know where she went."
"I think she left."
"Left? She was supposed to get an MRI and come right back."
"She did get the MRI. I just don't think she came back."
"Where would she go?"
"She mentioned she was late for work."
"Unbelievable. She's done this before, you know."

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

24th @ Mission

Posted at 9:04 PM

"Excuse me, home boy? What makes you think you so hot, huh? Who are you? Who are you? Yeah, nobody, that's who. Standing there all stupid with your white jeans."

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

24th @ Diamond

Posted at 11:04 AM

"I'm done with crazy chicks. My new thing is no crazy chicks in oh six."

Monday, April 10, 2006

One Market

Posted at 2:27 PM

"Hey, did you see that someone named Anus was on the call? Yeah, that was great."

Paradise Valley Retirement Community

Posted at 2:17 PM

"That John, he's a hell of a guy. On D-Day, he flew into Normandy on a glider. He was only eighteen."
"Wow, and he survived?"
"He sure did. Made it all the way to The Battle of the Bulge."
"I can't imagine what he saw. Does he ever talk about it?"
"A little bit."
"Did he kill anyone?"
"Oh, I bet he killed a lot of people over there."
"I wonder if he ever has nightmares or anything like that."
"I don't know. He eats a lot of blintzes, though. That's his favorite thing to eat at brunch. Blintzes with raspberry syrup."

Paradise Valley Retirement Community

Posted at 2:16 PM

"Getting old ain't for sissies."

Paradise Valley Retirement Community

Posted at 2:12 PM

"What was that? My God, you blew up the microwave! What did you do? Mom, you know you can't put aluminum in there."
"I wanted eggs."
"Well you can't put eggs in the microwave, either. What'd you do, wrap eggs in aluminum foil? How are we going to clean this up?"
"Stinks in here."

Paradise Valley Retirement Community

Posted at 2:08 PM

"Boy, it's hot in here. Holy cats."
"Holy cats? Don't you mean holy cow?"
"No, holy cats. I don't know what a holy cow is."

Paradise Valley Retirement Community

Posted at 2:05 PM

"What was that you say?"
"Wear your hearing aid!"
"Your hearing aid!"
"Oh, get off my back about my hearing aid. I've got four daughters and a wife always bugging me to wear the damn thing. I don't need you to get on the bandwagon."
"Yeah, but you can't even hear me."
"What was that you say?"

Paradise Valley Retirement Community

Posted at 2:00 PM

"Hey, what are they teaching you kids in high school these days?"
"I don't know. Stuff."
"They teach you about Mussolini?"
"Wasn't he that painter?"
"Painter? Heavens no. We fought him in World War Two. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, and the Japs. They teach you about that no good Stalin?"
"Oh, forget it. I'm going to get a bowl of ice cream."

Friday, April 07, 2006

MUNI: J Church

Posted at 8:46 PM

"Fifteen year old Michael Jackon's a terrorist. Pumpernickle makes the farts talk. Water is wet. Everybody wants the stink finger. Mel's Diner never served food. Women should've never worn pants. Fuck all of you. I'm not white today."

One Market

Posted at 2:56 PM

"So how's your day going?"
"Oh, it's been shitty. It's been a real shitty week. I was in a call with a customer's IT folks who hate our product. They hate us. They hate me."

Thursday, April 06, 2006

One Market

Posted at 4:54 PM

"Hopefully, smiling is optional."

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

One Market

Posted at 12:46 PM

"You should've just had breakfast with him. It's not like people do anything on Sundays except recover from hangovers and eat."

Specialty's: Mission @ Beale

Posted at 12:44 PM

"Oh, and we saw Joanne. She had kids."
"Well that's not surprising. In college, we called her "Joanne 'babies, babies, babies' Kennedy."

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Market @ Gough

Posted at 9:18 PM

"So I've got a cigarette in one hand, and my asthma inhaler in the other, and he says to me, 'You're fuckin' crazy.' I say, 'What's the matter with you? It's just a cigarette.'"

Market @ Gough

Posted at 9:12 PM

"I dug out the old red phone in my garage. Ever since I got sober, I thought one day God might call me on it and tell me what my life was supposed to be all about."

24th @ Valencia

Posted at 1:26 PM

"What's that smell?"
"I love that smell. I'd buy it. Wish it was, like, an air freshener. I'd smell it all day."

About Me

My name is Gavin. I'm a 32-year-old San Francisco, CA, resident who enjoys hearing the oddest conversations and sharing them with you.


Frank Black
Community of Writers
Sean Kirkpatrick
Drew's Script-O-Rama
Museum of Bad Art
The I.F.O.C.E


Zen Habits
The Happiness Project
Dean Karnazes
Mighty Foods
dangerous compassions
From the Rear View Mirror
Tony Pierce
Kevin Drum
Oliver Willis

Books To Read

Caught Inside

The Guards

All The Trouble You Need

Hardcore Zen

Keeping Warm


Continental Drift

Chez Chance

The Los Angeles Diaries

Bear Flag Rising


07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004
08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004
09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004
10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004
11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004
12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005
01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005
02/01/2005 - 03/01/2005
03/01/2005 - 04/01/2005
04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005
05/01/2005 - 06/01/2005
06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005
07/01/2005 - 08/01/2005
08/01/2005 - 09/01/2005
09/01/2005 - 10/01/2005
10/01/2005 - 11/01/2005
11/01/2005 - 12/01/2005
12/01/2005 - 01/01/2006
01/01/2006 - 02/01/2006
02/01/2006 - 03/01/2006
03/01/2006 - 04/01/2006
04/01/2006 - 05/01/2006
05/01/2006 - 06/01/2006
06/01/2006 - 07/01/2006
07/01/2006 - 08/01/2006
08/01/2006 - 09/01/2006
09/01/2006 - 10/01/2006
10/01/2006 - 11/01/2006
11/01/2006 - 12/01/2006
12/01/2006 - 01/01/2007
01/01/2007 - 02/01/2007
02/01/2007 - 03/01/2007
03/01/2007 - 04/01/2007
04/01/2007 - 05/01/2007
05/01/2007 - 06/01/2007
06/01/2007 - 07/01/2007
07/01/2007 - 08/01/2007
08/01/2007 - 09/01/2007
09/01/2007 - 10/01/2007
10/01/2007 - 11/01/2007
11/01/2007 - 12/01/2007
12/01/2007 - 01/01/2008
01/01/2008 - 02/01/2008
02/01/2008 - 03/01/2008
03/01/2008 - 04/01/2008
04/01/2008 - 05/01/2008
05/01/2008 - 06/01/2008
06/01/2008 - 07/01/2008
07/01/2008 - 08/01/2008
08/01/2008 - 09/01/2008
09/01/2008 - 10/01/2008
10/01/2008 - 11/01/2008
11/01/2008 - 12/01/2008
12/01/2008 - 01/01/2009
01/01/2009 - 02/01/2009
02/01/2009 - 03/01/2009
03/01/2009 - 04/01/2009
04/01/2009 - 05/01/2009
05/01/2009 - 06/01/2009
06/01/2009 - 07/01/2009
08/01/2009 - 09/01/2009
06/01/2010 - 07/01/2010


Get Firefox!

Stumble Upon Toolbar


Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons License.