The Dialog Blog
The Dialog Blog
People say it. I write it.

Sunday, July 31, 2005

24th @ Noe

Posted at 7:35 PM

"I hate her. She's poo. Broke my bike."

Friday, July 29, 2005


Posted at 9:46 AM

"That taqueria sucks. I ordered extra beans on my burrito, and they laughed."

One Market

Posted at 9:40 AM

"I'm so sick of--you don't shoot an email. There's no email gun. You send an email."

Thursday, July 28, 2005

One Market

Posted at 2:28 PM

"You get your car back?"
"Yeah, it's at the body shop."
"I can't believe the cops found it."
"They said they were a hundred percent sure they'd find it."
"Weird, I thought once a car was stolen it was gone forever."
"Me too. But the people who stole it only drove eight miles and took my Camelback."
"Is that the stereo?"
"No, the backpack I wear when I run--it's filled with water."

One Market

Posted at 2:12 PM

"Hey, next week at The Castro Theater they're there's a festival showing Ghostbusters, The Road Warrior, and Hello Dolly!."
"What's the theme?"
"I don't know, gay?"

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

One Market

Posted at 3:02 PM

"Hi, it's the fun bunch."
"Oh that's so gay."
"Thank you."

24th @ Valencia

Posted at 1:54 PM

"It's like Muslims are the new Jews or something."

Market @ Beale

Posted at 1:54 PM

"Gym for Jesus."

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

One Market

Posted at 10:41 AM

"Why are they all that windows?"
"I don't know. Go see."
"Ah, look at the seagulls! Oh my God!"
"Hey, what are you guys looking at?"
"Something pornographic."

Market @ California

Posted at 9:54 AM

"Hey, look. Retarded kids."

Monday, July 25, 2005

The Embarcadero

Posted at 6:25 PM

"I was, like, how could you not tell she was pregnant? Couldn't you see, like, that basketball of a stomach? He was, like, no. He was, all, I thought she was just chubby."

One Market

Posted at 6:23 PM

"See, didn't he sound nice?"
"Yeah, but he kept dropping the phone. I'm just going to Home Depot after work to see if I can do this construction stuff myself. I mean, if he can't even hold the phone, how could he hold a hammer?"


Posted at 11:01 AM

"What do you think of my hair?"
"It'll take at least four years to grow back."

Friday, July 22, 2005

One Market

Posted at 4:29 PM

"What's that?"
"Google Earth."
"Google this, Google that. Why don't they do something useful? Maps, done. Search, done. Needed? Not really. How about they give some of those billions to literacy or hunger or the environment--"
"Did you get a latte?"
"Uh, yeah."
"You get so bent out of shape with those. Look, it's cool. You can zoom into where you live."

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

The Ferry Building

Posted at 12:35 PM

"I pity the person who happens to be standing under the pigeon that ate the guacamole."

One Market

Posted at 9:16 AM

"Isn't that cute?"
"What is it?"
"It's a handbag."
"You couldn't fit an egg in that thing."
"All you need is to fit your keys and a twenty dollar bill."
"For three-hundred dollars?"
"But I have a handbag problem. None of mine look this cute."

24th @ Valencia

Posted at 9:11 AM

"Excuse me, sir. Can I ask you a question?"
"Thanks for listening. Okay, this is my situation. Okay, it's hard to talk about. I have HIV, and my roommate beat me up. He kicked me out. See my forehead. He burned his cigarette butt out right on my forehead. I don't know what I'm going to do."
"Sorry, I don't have any money."
"Nobody does, these days."

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

One Market

Posted at 12:44 PM

"I've been to San Jose maybe twice in the past five years to see my bother, and I don't care how close it is to San Francisco. I just never want to go to that town."

California @ Market

Posted at 10:38 AM

"The bus driver then told me that wasn't the stop. I said I've been stopping there for ten years--it's a stop. She said it's her bus, she knows the stops. She told me my stop was a block up. I told her my stop was a block behind us. Then she swerved into a parked car and knocked its rearview mirror off."

Monday, July 18, 2005

The Ferry Building

Posted at 2:41 PM

"Hello? Yeah. No, he's as wild as ever. He's really pumped about the baked beans."

One Market

Posted at 9:38 AM

"She had her baby three weeks early. I'm sitting at the restaurant, thinking she's never late, What's going on?"
"She didn't call you from the hospital?"
"How rude."

Friday, July 15, 2005

One Market

Posted at 1:59 PM

"I love Disneyland. It might be where I've had the best corndog of my life."

The Embarcadero

Posted at 12:33 PM

"That's a wicked nice ass."

Thursday, July 14, 2005

Jackson @ Webster

Posted at 10:15 AM

"Music is kind of off in Italy."
"What does that mean?"
"Well, they listen to Tina Turner and Rod Stewart and Credence Clearwater Revival like it's the newest thing. It's like they don't know it's no longer new in America. Plus, they're listening to American music. Old people listen to Italian music, but the young people listen to American. Except the Italian rap."
"Italian rap?"
"Yeah, and it's in English, which is even weirder. And the English doesn't translate very well. There was this one song where a guy kept saying he's going to slap the behind with something having to do with twine. It was like his English is limited and he's just trying to throw any words together that rhyme, and act like he's tough, too."
"How is that any different than American rap?"

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

One Market

Posted at 1:19 PM

"Hey, that's a nice looking salad."
"You can look all you want, but no touching. Security is on."
"Oh, yeah. What's that?"
"I don't know. Salmonella."

The Embarcadero

Posted at 1:14 PM

"Crab is thousand dollar fine."
"No, man, only if they're red. You see any red ones in there?"
"Then learn to be more blind, man. Thousand dollars be taken right out of your ass, if I was Fish & Game. You're lucky they don't hire brothers."

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

The Embarcadero

Posted at 12:49 PM

"Hey, man. Get away from my poles."
"Hey, I gots--"
"I don't care what you gots, get away from my fishing poles. Take a walk else wheres. Go enjoy yourself. You'll get hurt over here."
"Ah, shit, man..."

The Embarcadero

Posted at 12:46 PM

"No, man. Fish and Game will nail you if you don't have a license. It's because fresh water comes into the Bay and fucks everything up. I'll tell you, it's bullshit, man. I've seen the damn birds grab more fish out of here than us."

The Ferry Building

Posted at 12:45 PM

"Shoot. I should've brought my fanny-pack."

The Embarcadero

Posted at 11:34 AM

"What's wrong with Taylor's?"
"Gnats in the cheese."


Posted at 11:29 AM

"The schools are so, so bad."
"I know."
"They needs so, so much money. I hear they don't even have toilet paper."
"I know."
"They need to stop worrying about one plus one equals two. That will take care of itself. Kids need to go to a place where they feel respected. Comfortable. Loved. I bet more hugs would make up for all of the problems."

Monday, July 11, 2005

One Market

Posted at 9:48 AM

"Hey, here's a reading we should go to: Jewish Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender book discussion, discussing Between Sodom and Eden by Lee Walzer, followed by a screening of Out of the Closet and Into The Streets of Tel Aviv."
"I don't think so."
"How about the reading about the history of circumcision from the Bible onward?"
"Are there any readings around here that have nothing to do with the penis?"
"Everything has to do with the penis, dear."

Thursday, July 07, 2005


Posted at 10:31 AM

"Reggie, you're breaking up, homey. Shit, Reggie, you're breaking up. I's on BART, mother fucker. Yeah, yeah. On BART. Shit, hold on. Goddamn. This sucks. This is bullshit. Reggie, I back on. You hear me? I's on BART. You hear me? Goddamn piece of shit phone. Reggie, you hear me now? Pull the dick outta yo ear. Reggie, tell me, now. What'd she say about me? Tell me the truf. The truf, homey. She dig this? She dig all this? What? That's bullshit. She's ain't nothing but a class action ho."

One Market

Posted at 9:37 AM

"I sure didn't feel safe riding BART this morning."
"I didn't feel safe riding my bike anymore."

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

The Embarcadero

Posted at 12:44 PM

"Gay vacation."

Los Angeles

Posted at 10:29 AM

"Yeah, yeah. Her voice really made me feel something. I see a lot of shows, being in this business, and hers was the first voice I've heard in years that made me feel something."
"You work in the record industry?"
"I'm a musician, yeah."
"What label is your music on?"
"Well, now, I work at Subway."

Alaska Airlines Flight

Posted at 10:26 AM

"A buddy of mine said he was on a flight after 9/11, and a woman started having a stroke. A doctor from the back of the plane ran up the aisle to help her, and an Air Marshall didn't know what was going on, and he punched the guy in the face and knocked him out. Thought he was a terrorist."
"What happened to the woman?"
"She was okay, I guess. My friend told me that when the doctor came to, the Air Marshall was sorry and apologized. Told everyone to forget the incident."

Alaska Airlines Flight

Posted at 10:23 AM

"Sir! Sir! You have to sit down now!"
"But I..."
"Sir, now!"
"But, bathroom..."
"Oh, darn it."

About Me

My name is Gavin. I'm a 32-year-old San Francisco, CA, resident who enjoys hearing the oddest conversations and sharing them with you.


Frank Black
Community of Writers
Sean Kirkpatrick
Drew's Script-O-Rama
Museum of Bad Art
The I.F.O.C.E


Zen Habits
The Happiness Project
Dean Karnazes
Mighty Foods
dangerous compassions
From the Rear View Mirror
Tony Pierce
Kevin Drum
Oliver Willis

Books To Read

Caught Inside

The Guards

All The Trouble You Need

Hardcore Zen

Keeping Warm


Continental Drift

Chez Chance

The Los Angeles Diaries

Bear Flag Rising


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