"You notice that three-second delay on the doors opening when we swipe our badges?"
"Yeah, that's dangerous when you got to take an explosive dump. No, listen. I'm serious. On Tuesday, my stomach was killing me. Something was dying inside. And I like ran to the bathroom, and both stalls were taken. So, I head over to the next building, and all three stalls were occupied over there, too. So, I took the elevator up to the eighth floor, and all three of those fucking stalls were taken. I was, like, what am I going to do? So I ran back to our floor, checked the stalls there again, and they were still busy. I went back to my desk and just sat there for a while. I thought I was going to lose it right there. We'd all be going home early if I did that. So, finally I just said fuck it and took the shuttle bus home. That was the most painful thirty-five minutes of my life. But at least the stalls were open at the San Mateo office."