"We were thinking about going there on a vacation until we read about the roaming gangs with machetes."
"Yeah, that's worse than the diarrhea, I'm sure."
"What do you say to guys with machetes?"
"Here's my money."
"You could say, How dare you? Don't you know I'm an American?"
"Yeah, that would be smart."
"I'd love to read a book about all of the dumb things Americans say as they're being robbed in other countries."