"Was that a bark?"
"That was the dumbest dog in Fremont."
"Wow, he's pretty cool looking. What is he, lab and hound?"
"If you take him home, he's whatever mix you want him to be."
"You seriously want to get rid of him?"
"You smell that? That's him. He always smells like that. It's the hound. We took him to the vet and tried to get some pills so he'd stop stinking up the house, but the vet just told us he's hound, and hounds stink."
"He's not that bad."
"That's because I squirted him with some of Donna's perfume. Now, he just smells like dog stink and perfume. The smell keeps me up at night. You sure you don't want him?"
"I'd love to, but my meaningful relationship with my landlord would sour. What's wrong with his tail?"
"He's bit the end so much it's crooked."