"I'm new. Here for my ID."
"What's your employee number?"
"I don't know. I'm new."
"Did you talk to HR?"
"Yeah, they said talk to you."
"No, you have to talk to IT."
"I talked to them already. They said talk to you."
"No, that's not how it works. HR gives you an employee number to give to IT, who gives you a badge that you give to us, and then we turn that into an ID that has your photo on it."
"I just want something to get into the bathroom."
"Sorry, you have to talk to HR."
"You kidding?"
"No."